She's 29...

Today is my mom's birthday. According to her Facebook page, she turned 29 today. Yes, you read that right, my mom is on Facebook, and she listed the year she was born as 1979 on her Facebook page "so that no one would know how old she really is." Because evidently my mom has a lot of Facebook friends that don't know her personally? Who is she trying to fool, her family or her friends from high school or her kids friends that want to be her friend too. I am pretty sure that all of those people know that she was not born in 1979, especially her dad (yes, my grandpa has a Facebook page too)! That is one of the reasons why I love my mom, because she is one of those people who can do her own thing and not worry about what others think. We have often said that my mom is slightly insane (really, who isn't) but trying to convince everyone that she was born after she had graduated from high school, got married, and had 3 of her children is kind of pushing it, especially since the fourth child was born 5 months after she was.

My mom is a trooper. As someone who has a medical history the size of China, she really is an inspiration of a positive outlook. Many times doctors couldn't believe she was conscious, let alone attemptting to vacuum her house (she always likes to vacuum when she is feeling her worst). She recently (a few months ago) had surgery on her foot, and since she is crutches deficient (meaning horrible at using them, which is funny for us to watch) she has been confined to hopping (equally as funny to watch) or using a wheelchair. And since her house is not really wheelchair accessible, especially during the remodel of her kitchen, she has mostly been confined to her bedroom, and her bed. A great example of my mom's positive outlook can be shown in her response to one of my favorite emails, a "getting to know you one." The question was: How do you relax? My mom's answer was: "It is hard to relax from resting. I usually just fluff my pillows, prop myself up, and pour a fresh Pepsi."

My mom is a wonderful woman who taught us how to laugh through basically everything, good and bad. If you can't find the joy in life, what is the purpose. Therefore, I believe she deserves to be 29 for as long as she wants! We love you, Mom! Happy Birthday!!

Just a size...

D and I have been invited to a masquerade party in a few weeks. As such, we recently purchased costumes online. On the website that I ordered the costumes from there is a warning, "Costume sizes run small, please check the measurements to ensure accuracy in fit." What I would like to know is how does a size "run small?" Why isn't a 10 a 10? Why is a 10 an 8 in some stores and a 12 in another? WHY? It is very difficult to have to try on every single item that you would like to purchase just because you can't determine whether you will even fit in the item based on the size. When my sisters and I discuss pant sizes we always differentiate where that size is from, such as, "These new jeans are a size 12 from the Gap, which means a Wal-Mart 10!" When I went to get my wedding dress the sales lady asked me what pants size I wore and then got me dresses a size bigger because wedding dresses "run small." If items "run small" and the designers know that they "run small" why don't they put a tag in the item with a smaller number on it? I mean really, why simplify things for people, or make people feel good about the size they are wearing. Life is much better when people think they are larger than they really are. It really makes people want to shop more. 

Yesterday, our costumes arrived on our front porch step, which is another whole story as to why the UPS man rings the doorbell and then bangs on the door like the boogie man is chasing him only to leave the package on my porch without even waiting the 10 seconds for me to answer the door. Anyway, our costumes arrived. The costume that I ordered for myself says that it should fit a woman from size 16 to 24. Well, since I am closer to the bottom of that, I figured there would be no issues. Let's just say that if a woman that normally wears a size 24 tries to fit into my dress, it will no longer be a dress because I, at an 18, barely fit into it! BARELY! It is just a size? Yeah right, how good do I feel now?

I told D that size shouldn't matter, it is just numbers. When I met D and we got married, I wore between a size 8 and 10 depending on where I purchased my clothing of course. Now after having a baby and gaining a lot of weight (sadly), I wear an 8 plus a 10, but they are the same numbers and sizes are just numbers. So, it shouldn't really matter right. One size fits most...yeah right!

Our joy in the journey...

Yesterday while listening to the advice of our beloved prophet, Thomas S. Monson, during General Conference, I had to take a moment to determine if our family really takes "joy in the journey." I don't want to have the hopes of tomorrow be shadowed by the emptiness of yesterday. Really, I don't. I had made our family watch conference in mine and D's bedroom because it is more comfortable to me than our family room couches. So, as I sat in my recliner, completely comfortable, I looked over to my bed where D, Olie, Skater, and Moo were lying side by side. Fuss was sleeping in his room, which really made things more joyful overall for everyone at that moment. I thought about how our boys who like to eat nonstop had eaten dinner with their mom on Thursday night and then stopped for a hamburger with their dad on the way to our house. That is joyful for them, not so much for me since I had dinner waiting at home. Friday night the older boys had slept over at D's parents' house, which was joyful for all of us. Saturday we had gone to lunch with my family to celebrate my graduation from the medical transcription program. That was joyful as well. As "joyful" as our journey has been, we could put a lot more effort into it.

We did let the kids basically eat whatever they wanted for dinner on Saturday. D took the kids to the store and let them choose what to eat while watched a movie together. My boys came back with dinner, which I think for kids is very joyful. We had Laffy Taffy, Gummy Worms, Smarties, Lemonheads, and Carrots with light ranch dip (that one was my choice). We are totally winning the "fun parents of the year" award. As conference ended, and Fuss woke up, I realized that the peacefulness that had just filled my home would soon be over. Fights would begin again. There would surely be complaining of some sort. I was now standing in the doorway of my bedroom. D was in the recliner with Fuss on his lap. Olie was sitting on the floor leaning up against the recliner. Skater was on my bed. Moo had disappeared. So, I picked up a pillow and started smacking the boys. As the boys smacked me back with other pillows from my bed, the giggling began. D and Fuss just sat there and watched as Moo appeared and joined forces with his brothers. Sadly, my joy lasted longer than my energy and I threw myself on the bed, and continued to get pummeled by the pillows. Then D and I traded off. I took Fuss, who was laughing hysterically, and D took the pillow from me. I knew that had created joy when even though D had Skater pinned on the bed under one arm and Olie under the other, all 3 of the boys continued to attempt beating him with the pillows.

And I made an executive decision (as an executive in our home) that we definitely need to have more pillow fights in our house!

It happened to me...

Well, it has happened. I have read it on other blogs, but never have had it happen to me before. I have been tagged. I am a player so I will play along...

7 Things I LOVE:

1. I love sweats. I love the comfy warmth of thick cotton on my legs. I love that they are not too tight. I love that they have an elastic in the waist, but it is supposed to be there so no one thinks that I am just too large for non-elastic sweats or too old like if I wore Jeans with elastic waists. I love that I can wear them all day and then to bed if I want to. I love that I can wear them when I take Fuss on walks and no one thinks I am weird. They just think I am attempting to exercise. Oh, the deceit of sweats!

2. I love TIVO. I love that I can record what I want, when I want to, and not have to watch it on somebody else's schedule. I love the total and complete control of only watching the commercials if I want to. I can even pick and choose which commercials I watch. 

3. I love having milk delivered to my front porch. I love milk alone, but having it delivered in any quantity I want each and every week just makes my life so much simpler.

4. I love ceiling fans. I love that if I am a little too hot, I can flip a switch and a nice breeze fills the room. I love the purr of the ceiling fan that lulls me to sleep every night. I love that the ceiling fans are high enough that although I know there is dust on the blades, I can't see it. Therefore, I don't have to do anything about it. 

5. I love pictures. I love to take pictures. I love to look at pictures. I just don't like to be in pictures, which is the main reason that I love to take them!

6. I love my recliner. I love that it was purchased with the money that I received after my grandma passed away. I love it because it was purchased because Fuss was on the way. I love it because we call it the "Grandma Rocker" and it reminds me of the way she used to sit in her rocker and visit or read with us when we went to her house. I love it because it makes me think of my grandma every time I rock my own baby and read to him.

7. I love breakfast. Breakfast really is the most important meal of the day. I love breakfast foods, sausage, bacon, eggs, french toast...mmmm! I love having breakfast for dinner. I love that as much as I love breakfast, I usually just eat cold cereal for breakfast. That makes "real breakfast foods" a treat when we have them!

7 things I HATE:

1. I hate cherry flavored ice cream, or ice cream with cherries in it. I love ice cream, and hate cherries so the cherries just ruin a beautiful thing, and I hate it when beauty is ruined!

2. I hate weeds. I hate that they make it known to everyone that drives past my house that I don't do yard work. I hate that they are much more prominent than the plants that I don't really like either.

3. I hate dust. I don't mind doing the dusting, I just wish it would stay that way a little longer. It seems that as soon as I am done dusting, the dust is creeping back onto the surfaces that I just dusted. 

4. I hate laundry. I hate that it is such a time consuming process and requires so much remembering. It would be much easier if the washer and dryer were just one machine that would wash and then automatically dry. I hate that I have to remember when I put a load in the washer and how long it has been there to know if it is still able to be dried, or if I need to waste more time and money re-washing the load I forgot about. I hate that when the clothes are dried, if I don't take them out and immediately hang them up, I will be stuck ironing (or wearing wrinkled clothes, which is more likely). I hate that I have to fight the hangers on the bar in the closet trying to gather enough to hang up the load that I just threw on my bed.

5. I hate scary movies. I would rather watch the news where I get just as frightened.

6. I hate living far away from my family. I realize that it is only an hour away, but with the price of gas I might as well move back to Florida since I saw them about the same from there. Except I hated living in Florida. 

7. I hate my storage room. I hate that in all actuality we have no idea what is down there. I hate that there is just a plethora of boxes filled with items from mine and D's lives before we even knew each other, but that neither of us has the desire to go through to see if we can get rid of it. I hate that it is looming over me and that I know that one day I will break down and go through it....maybe it will just loom until I die!

Now for the rules: You can't use your husband or kids as things you love (or hate depending on your mood) that would be too easy. 

Tags: You have to make your own list...maw ha ha ha (in case you watch Hannah Montana like we do!)  Tagged: Angie, Theresa, Stephanie, Melissa, Erica, Sheryl, Missy. And I do LOVE my friends...all of them!

I said, "I love you..."

I think that it is very important to tell your children that you love them frequently. The problem that I have realized recently is that although I do tell my children that I love them frequently, it is usually followed by a request. Such as, "I love you too much to allow you to act this way!" "I love you and that is why I won't let you do something stupid." or "I love you, now be quiet!" I am not sure that this is the best way to express my love for my children to them, but when it is a non-stop day of noise...that is the best way to describe it...it is hard to stop and sincerely tell the noise makers how you really feel about them without trying to establish some sort of sanity first. It stems from adult interaction that this is the way I deal with my kids. Whenever someone in my family says something that they know is going to get under someone else's skin, they follow it by a somewhat sarcastic, "love you." D does it too. He teases me, then he tells me that he loves me and grins in a hope that I will not be mad at him. I usually follow it up with, "No, you don't." It is hard for me to point a finger when I do the same thing to him too.

When kids tell you they love you, it is because they do. Kids have yet to learn the manipulation the words "I love you" can hold. Recently, I had a conversation with my nephew Buddy, who is 3, and he loves me. I know he does because he told me in a way that made me know that he did. It was the day I found out that I had passed my final, Buddy called to congratulate me. Our conversation went like this:

Buddy: Dood (good) dob (job), Annie. Dood dob on you test.

Me: Thanks, Buddy! I love you!

Buddy: I love you too. I don't hate you.

That is true love!

To accomplish something...

Throughout life we are put through a series of disappointments and failures, but there is no reason to be upset about it. Everyone goes through the downs in life, and sometimes the ups. I recently completed the medical transcriptioning course that I have been taking. This coarse is designed to be done at your own pace but within a year. It is a good thing that you can purchase time extensions when needed, because I needed 4 of them. The reason I needed 4 of them is because I was working outside of our home when I started the coarse, and I was pregnant. So, my ambition towards this extra work was not really all that high. I thought that I would have more energy to work on it after Fuss was born. I was wrong. I had less energy and less ambition. It wasn't until I became unemployed that I realized where my ambition had been hiding. I realized that this coarse was the ticket to me being able to stay home with my Fuss all the time. I started working on it, and I finished in 5 1/2 months! Oh, why I could have done with that before Fuss was born...I wouldn't have missed out on the first 10 months of his life! I realized just how much I was missing when his nanny had to tell me what his favorite kind of juice was. I should have known that!

Anyway, I have now passsed and I am graduating from the program with honors. You are allowed to take the final up to 3 times, but I only had to take it once! I called my mom and told her how excited I was to have finally accomplished something. She asked me what in the world I was talking about. So, I explained: I finished high school and graduated with high honors, then I finished a 2 year college, got my Associates degree, went to 1 more year of college and dropped out. I went to cosmetology school, finished, graduated, and never got my license. I have a habit of not finishing what I started. Until now!

It is amazing how one little accomplishment can change your whole perspective on things. I have put my family first. I will be working from home while my son is sleeping, not missing a moment of his awake life. I did it, and I feel great about it. Suddenly, I feel like I can accomplish anything! I may even be able to lose a couple of pounds now! We'll see!

No cavities...

So, yesterday I had my biannual visit to the dentist. Although I have a wonderful dentist, the best I have ever had in my life actually, I still get anxiety before I go for this visit. The morning of a dental visit I always use my Sonicare toothbrush to make sure that my teeth are as clean and shiny as possible. You would also think that I would floss, but I don't. I really like my dentist's office because everyone is so nice. You walk in and they greet you by name and with a smile. How they remember everyone's name, I don't know, but for the most part they do. There is no receptionist desk. There is no counter with a bell. There is just friendly people all dressed alike, smiling and telling me how nice it is to see me. If I was greeted like this at more places, I might leave the house a little more often.

Anyway, it is inevitable that every time I sit in the dentist's chair, someone is going to ask me how the flossing is going. I would like to tell them it is going just wonderfully, but I can't lie. It is like when the eye doctor asks me if I ever sleep in my contacts. I told her that I could say I didn't, but that she and I would both know I was lying. That story holds true for flossing as well. So, yesterday when the wonderfully nice hygenist, who can carry on a conversation with anyone who can't talk because they have dental tools and the hygenist's hands in their mouth better than you would imagine, asked me "how the flossing is going," I answered honestly, "Well, you should know since you were the last one to floss my teeth, which was about 6 months ago." I can't lie to her, which I kind of wish I could. So, I again promised to try to focus on flossing more. She even gave me 6 spools of floss to encourage me, but I can't promise that I will get it done. I just don't enjoy forcing a string in between my teeth and moving it back and forth to remove the gunk that I didn't know about, and really didn't want to know about. I prefer to think that brushing alone does a good enough job. I haven't had a cavity for years, and I hope I am not jinxing myself by saying that. (I am knocking on wood as I type this).

I realize that dental health is important, and a great smile is important too, but I promise no one is looking in between my teeth when I smile. Most of the time they are probably thinking, "Wow, you have a huge mouth!" Because I do. My family is known for their large heads. Fuss' pediatrician comments on Fuss' noggin every visit...because he is in a higher percentile for head size by about 20 points over height and weight. My nephew's head was so large that we used to laugh that the reason he fell over so much when trying to walk was because he was so top heavy. My dad can't wear normal hats, and I fall into the large noggin catagory too. My mouth is so wide that my large-headed nephew once tried to see if his head could fit inside of it. It didn't, but let's just say my smile is in proportion to my head size. I am probably the only one that dental people have to tell, "don't open quite so wide." I can fit my fist in my mouth, which means that the dental hygenist can easily fit both her hands in my mouth for easy accessibility for cleaning.

As I type this, I realize that I real have no excuse for not flossing daily, but most likely the hygenist will be the next person to floss my teeth...maybe.

Sing it, baby...

My sister once said that she wished that life was a musical. She thought it would be so fun if the whole world could spontaneously break out in a song and dance that everybody knew. I agree, the world would be a much happier place if the world would sing together more. I am not a singer so much. D and I had been married only a week when the truth of his feelings toward my singing came out. We were sitting in church, singing a hymn, and D turned to me and said, "You don't sing very good do you?" No, evidently I don't. I have actually been told that I don't sing well throughout my entire life, even when I was forced to publicly sing while working at a karaoke restaurant. The words "tone deaf" have been used more than once.

Even so, I sing at home all the time. I sing whenever I have the radio on. I dance too, but that inability is a whole different story. I sing to the kids while making them meals or treats. Sometimes, I sing just to annoy them. I can't help it. I think it is funny! Usually the songs I sing are songs that are either completely made up by me, or they are real songs that I have changed the words to. I like to include the kids names in them when possible. That is why I make them up. Sometimes the songs that I make up are completely based on the feelings that I am having at the time or the activity that we are performing.  For example, I sing the following made up songs to Fuss almost daily.

Bathtime Song:

We wash your face, and wash your belly.

Wash your arms and legs.

We wash your toes and wash your fingers.

And wash your little dinger.

We wash your back and wash your bum.

We'll wash your hair, and then we're done.

Bedtime song when a fight is given:

Rock-a-bye, close your eyes.

Go to sleep 'til morning.

Rock-a-bye, don't you cry,

Because this is your last warning.

While my children think I am weird, I think I am fun! Really it is my opinion that matters...at least that is what I have decided.

Getting to know me...

In the last week alone, I have had probably 5 or 6 emails asking me questions to "get to know me." While I find them fun to read from my friends, I don't really know how many people really want to get to know me, especially since they are usually sent by people who already do. However, I feel like there is this pressure that you feel if you don't forward emails to other people, or respond to the one that sent it to you, like they aren't important or something. I really don't like the ones that say, "if you don't forward this..." these are the consequences. Really, because when I broke my foot we didn't even have the internet, so I don't think my bad luck comes from the lack of forwarding emails. I don't really think that not forwarding emails is effecting my life that deeply overall. I also dislike the "getting to know you emails that ask, "Who do you think will reply to this email?" There are enough unavoidable pressures in life that this question is really just unfair. Sometimes when I am reading someone else's answers, I chant the phrase, "please don't be me, please don't be me!" over and over and over again, and then I scroll down to see the answer. Usually, it is me. I think it is because I have no other life but to send and respond to emails, so I do it. When I send these emails, I put the least likely person to responds name, followed by something like, "She never replies." Ok, I have only really done that once, but it totally worked and I got a response from that person (Lois).

Well, I got another one today, and I decided that I am just going to give the whole world (or at least the few of you that read this) my answers, and don't worry I cut down this 55 question email--no one needs to know that much about me!

1. What time did you get up this morning? 4:34 when I had to use the bathroom, 6:03 to 6:32 when Fuss thought it was time to get up until I convinced him to go back to sleep, and 6:54 when Fuss woke up and wouldn't go back to sleep.

2. Diamonds or pearls? Both...why can't I have both? Don't I deserve nice things for all occasions? While diamonds are always gorgeous, pearls have their place. I would like both of them to be real also.

3. What was the last film you saw at the cinema? "Iron Man" I have 4 boys, and when my husband took me on a date, we saw "Iron Man." (I did like it though)

4. What food do you dislike? Foods that have no calories, like onions and asparagus.

5. What kind of car do you drive? I have a 2001 Chevy Malibu, sauteed mushroom color, that has a dented hood from when I ran into the back of another car, a big scrape down the side from when I ran into the side of my garage while pregnant and backing out, no hubcaps since my husband said I either had to buy new ones or take off the 2 1/2 that were on it, and that has 185,000 miles on the odometer! I also drive a white Eddie Bauer Edition Ford Expedition XL, but only once a year since we can't afford the gas to take it further than the grocery store...ok, really we drive it when the older boys are here, but it has less than 8,000 miles on it and it is 1 1/2 years old. Obviously, I drive the mushroom mobile more.

6. What characteristic do you despise? Dishonesty.  I would rather someone be honest to a fault rather than dishonest...don't lie to me!

7. Favorite item of clothing? Anything that is large enough to not accentuate the midsection rolls.

8. If you could go anywhere in the world on vacation, where would you go? Disneyland or Washington DC. I wouldn't be expected to wear a swimsuit, and both require a lot of walking...exercise and fun!

9. Favorite brand of clothing? Anything with a plus size that doesn't make me look like I am wearing my grandmother's kitchen curtains. I would also like brands that have sizes that run big (as if that ever happened).

10. What was your most recent memorable birthday? When I was 10, I didn't get a cake...my dad was working out of town and my mom said that we would have one when he got back, but we didn't. When I was 21, my mom made me 2 birthday cakes to make up for it, but you can't make up 11 years with a cake...more ice cream would have been better!

11. Are you a morning or night person? Neither! I am a middle-of-the-day person. My good hours are 11:00 a.m. to 3:00 p.m.

12. What is your shoe size? 9 1/2 wide and without any arch support for my flat feet.

13. Pets? Unfortunately...

14. Any new and exciting news you'd like to share with us? Yesterday, we had no junk mail and no bills in the mail! Only the insurance cards for the truck! That is new and exciting for us!

15. What did you want to be when you were little? Erma Bombeck (the writer)

16. How are you today? Showered with makeup...totally presentable for public!

17. What is your favorite flower? Fake ones...I kill them if they are real, and I don't even mean too. If you don't believe me, you should see my front yard.

18. What was the last thing you ate? None of your business...dang it, I wish I would have read this question before I just scarfed a mini Take 5 bar.

19. If you were a crayon, what color would you be? Yellow-green, because what do you use yell0w-green to color, dying grass?

20. Favorite soft drink? Pepsi, sweet Pepsi...don't be mad at me because I gave you up. I have not replaced you with any other soft drink, only water.

21. Favorite Restaurant? Italian and Mexican ones because I love cheesy foods...again, why can't I lose weight?

22. Real hair color? When I was in cosmetology school, one of our instructors held up a hair color swatch and declared, "This is the ugliest color. No one will ever want this color.  The only purpose for this color is to create other colors." That color was an exact match of my real color...6A (very ashy brown).

23. Chocolate or vanilla? Chocolate poured over vanilla ice cream!

24. What is under your bed? I don't want to know!

25. Salty or sweet? Salty followed by sweet....

26. How many years at your current job? Motherhood...almost 1.5. Wife....just over 3. Collecting unemployment...about 5 months.

27. How many towns have you lived in? A better question for me is, How many times did you move OUT of your parent's house? 9 

28. How many people will you send this to? I hope a lot!

Girl hair...

I have girl hair. I know I do because a few years ago my niece told me that I did. We were sitting at the computer, me and Lou, playing a game that had colored blocks. When a purple block appeared on the screen, Lou, who was 3 years old at the time, declared that purple was her favorite color. Then an orange block appeared, and Lou told me that that was Oni's (her younger brother) favorite color. So when a green block appeared, I told her that green was my favorite color. Lou got a puzzled look on her face, then furrowed her brow and studied me for a little bit before she matter-of-factly stated, "That can't be your favorite color, because green is a boy color and you have girl hair." That was a big relief, but I still like green.

It has recently come to my attention that Lou is not the only child who uses hair to help her determine gender. During the great weight debacle of 2008, my sister and I have joined forces to help encourage and berate each other when necessary. During one of our conversations about how well she is doing and how well I am not, she mentioned that she had lost 8 pounds in 1 week since starting a new dance class. I was very excited for her, but I was not the only one. Her 5-year-old son also noticed her weightloss, and told her that she is "looking better, and when you lose all the fat on your tummy, you will look like my daddy. Except that you will still have long hair." Oh, what we all wouldn't give to look like our husbands with long hair. If I am going to look like D, I will have get some testosterone shots to improve my mustache and goatee...

Here is the thing, with my football player shoulders, and my thunderous thighs, I already look like a boy. I have a picture that D took of me riding behind Fuss on a carousel at the zoo. After seeing it, I was beyond extatic that I decided to get off of the zebra and stand to the side for the rest of the picture taking opportunities. I look like a middle-linebacker with girl hair. It almost made me want to grow my hair even longer, to feminise my box-shaped body. Then I saw our family picture from when I did have longer hair, and the flatness on the top of my head only accentuated the roundness of my second chin. Therefore, it has been decided that it is a good thing that I have short girl hair, and no facial hair...otherwise children all over the city might think Fuss has 2 daddys...