Showered...maybe tomorrow I will put on some makeup...

Why is it that men can get a way with looking however they want, at least to an extent.  I woke up this morning and showered (yea for everyone), pulled my hair into a ponytail (which at shorter than shoulder length, is hard to do), applied 2 barettes and 3 bobby pins in just the right places to keep all of my hair neatly slicked back, cleaned and toned my face (and by toned, I mean used toner--no exercising was involved), put on clean underwear (again, yea for everyone), a clean pair of sweats, and even a clean over-sized T-shirt, and came into my office. This process, since I did also brush my teeth, still took at least 30 minutes...shaving time included. My husband showered, brushed his teeth, put on clean jeans, a collared shirt, and left for work all in a matter of 10 minutes, and he looks good, where as I...not so much.

My hubby has a belly, don't tell him, but he does, and it is my fault since he didn't have it before we were married. I too have a belly, which I did have a little of before we were married, but now it is much larger.  Him having a belly isn't really a big deal. Me having a belly is a BIG deal...granted mine is bigger, but I did have a baby...and contrary to appearances, he is not still in there. 

There was a day when I wasn't overweight, and I do really mean just 1 day. No matter what I do, I gain weight. I started walking for exercise faithfully about 4 weeks ago. I chose walking mostly because it would be an embarrasement to the human race if I were to run. Before I got married I used to go to the gym for 2 1/2 hours a day, 5 days a week.  Now, all I do is think about working out and I am exhausted.  I do think about it for about 10 hours a day, 7 days a week though. 

Back to my point, what was it...oh yeah, I started walking about 3 1/2 miles per day at approximately 12-15 minutes per mile thinking that I would lose some of the baby fat I have lovingly held onto since I was a baby. Now, 4 weeks later, I have proudly GAINED 10 pounds! That is right gained 10 freaking pounds. I like to complain about it, because I really want people to know that I put an effort into something, even if looks are deceiving.  When you complain about something, people always try to cheer you up, even if inside they hate you for complaining.

All the "cheerer uppers" keep telling me, "it must be muscle, muscle weighs more than fat." Really? Does muscle weigh more than fat, cause I think 1 pound of fat weighs 1 pound and 1 pound of muscle weighs 1 pound.  If you really want to cheer me up, you could buy me a new shirt and sew a tag in the collar that verifies that it is a size, well even an XL would make me feel better at this point.  Am I really that illogical of a thinker? I know that a pound weighs a pound. And I am not really sure, but I have felt the ring around my belly, and it does not feel anything like when you push on flexed biceps, not at all!  It is actually more like pushing on an old, partially deflated balloon, or a loaf of bread, or even a roll of cookie dough, but there is no incredible hulk in there.  I don't just have a spare tire, I have a stack of them...who needs AAA, if my car gets a flat, I could roll myself home on my midsection.  I still don't understand how you (and by you I mean me) could get pregnant, gain 60 lbs (yes, I know 60 is twice what they "recommend" you gain--we'll get into who "they" are another day), have a baby that weighs almost 7 lbs, and lose 300 gallons of fluid and still only lose 6 pounds.  It is as messed up as walking at the crack of the roosters crow everyday and gaining 10 lbs.  I think my body has a conspiracy against me.

Anyway, to attempt to rid myself of the initial 54 and now the 10 pound weight gain, I started doing the Weight Watchers program, and I am happy to say that after 2 weeks of Weight Watchers (cause I don't want to diet, I want to start living) I am now only 4 pounds above my pre-walking weight--which to recap is still 58 pounds above my pre-baby weight.  Seriously though, I did look at a mini candybar today, so I am a little afraid of weighing in on Monday...I'll let you know how it goes.