Yoga...not really for everyone...

I realize it has been a while, but at least it hasn't been two years! I am going to attempt to do better, but lets face it I'm not real great in the resolution department. As evident by my constant battle for determination to lose weight. It is this very battle that brings me here tonight...

For Christmas my sister-in-law, whom I adore and aspire to look like without having to do all the work, gave me a beginner's yoga kit. I had mentioned that I really wanted to get serious about losing weight, long term. She does yoga and looks like she does yoga, hence the aspiration to look like her. So it really was the perfect gift. As such, this morning (yes, only this morning) after nearly a month of staring at the lovely green box (green is my favorite color) I was lying in bed, hoping for a nap, and mentioned to Fuss that maybe we should do yoga together. You would have thought I asked him to go for a Pepsi and a caramel-cookie dough shake. He was so excited! I let his excitement brew for a bit and then like the good mom I am I tried to talk him out of it. I was really tired after all! That was not going to happen. It took mere minutes of his nonstop chatter, his changing into shorts without a shirt so he could look like the guy on the box, running upstairs to grab an extra yoga mat and block, and even finding his belt to use as a yoga strap, for me to realize the only way to make it stop was to indeed do the yoga.

So Fuss and I cleared a spot in my room to lay out our mats. He insisted that his be right next to mine, even though I insisted we needed some room. I found that arguing with a 4-year-old who keeps saying, "Yes, this will be so good! You will feel so good!" even though he has never even been exposed to yoga before is an act of futility. It's a good thing I was too tired to care. We started out doing a simple warmup. I can lie on my back and practice breathing and meditation with the best of them. Sometimes in this house you have to pretend to be nearly dead just to get some peace and quiet, even then it's questionable though! The further we got into the workout, I more I realized that the person I want to pretend I am no longer exists. It's really an eye opener when some random dude on your TV tells you to simply pull your knee to your chest and you think he's lucky you got it off the floor. Seriously, I know why fat people do not do yoga. It's because their stomach is between their knee and their chest and there is no getting around it, over it, or even beside it, which actually is easier than the other two options.

I do have to admit also that I loved watching Fuss follow all the moves and try so hard. Since he was so much better at it than I was, he gave me encouraging words like, "wrap your arm around your knee, Mommy" to which I responded, "I think my arms have shrunk while the rest of me has grown." Although I know that yoga is supposed to be relaxing and help you be focused and ready for the day, I think that day is a long way away. I really feel no more confident than I did staring at the pretty green box. In retrospect, I kind of wish I had a video camera to watch later for a good humiliating laugh, but overwhelming glad that I didn't at the same time. I know more than a few people who would love to hold that over my head.

As we were driving home from some errands this afternoon, Fuss asked me if we could do "our" yoga again tonight. I told him it might be possible. He also told me that we should take the yoga DVD to grandma's because "Grandma really loves yoga!" That surely must be where I got it from. I didn't know it was a genetic trait! All I can say is that I truly hope it does get better, easier, less humiliating, etc, because Fuss has announced to me that "we will do yoga everyday!!" Yay!!